Life is a generally demanding project – we are constantly pushed by circumstances, by society and by our own dreams and expectations to evolve, grow and move on. And given the speed of today’s’ life, it is easy for us to start expecting the same speed of growth and progress in ourselves.
When I was a teenager, I thought that by the age of 30 I will have quite a lot of stuff figured out, like perfect social skills, relationships and career, for example. Still not quite there, I have to say. And sometimes it gets frustrating, why I still fail in certain situations, given the amount of practice I had with them.
But luckily it didn’t take me that long to learn how to deal with this frustration. Now I have a list of reminders that I tell to myself to make accepting my mistakes easier.
I am grateful
Instead of resenting, I try to feel grateful for the situation, because it gave me a good practice and new insights on how to improve in the future. Even a negative situation is a chance for mastering something. Remember – life will keep pushing you anyway, so it is better to face your imperfection, analyze it and decide what you can do better next time.
I am a work in progress
With years I started to realize more and more that there is no final perfection point. I will keep growing all my life and in every age there will be something for me to work on. And it is fine, because it makes life interesting and because everyone else is the same – we are all work in progress.
I am good enough
It is a common way of thinking that if you are not perfect, then you are not good enough. This is not true, if you check this belief carefully. If you remember your relationships with other people, you will notice that others are just as imperfect as you are, and yet you forgive them and love them, and it wouldn’t cross your mind to call them “not good enough”.
You are the same and you deserve the same kindness despite your imperfections. You are good enough.
Perfection does not equal happiness
Most importantly, the reason why we can become obsessed with perfection is that we subconsciously believe that it will bring us happiness. This is a complex and deep belief, and a lot can be said about it. But the thing that I remind myself the most is that happiness is internal and is my choice, while perfection is only external and doesn’t depend on me all the time. So they are not the same and they are not connected.
I’m sure that anyone can remember a time, when they were happy, despite imperfect circumstances or some mistake that they made, as a real-life proof of that idea.
My imperfections make me unique
Let’s be honest – if all of us were perfect, we would all be the same and would do perfectly similar things, like robots who were programmed to do a job at a certain standard. Imperfection adds to individuality and at the same time pushes you to grow and develop, making your life more interesting and meaningful.
I hope that this small list of tips will help you to stop and reassess how harsh you are on yourself for slipping up occasionally.
Use it to find more kindness for yourself and accept the mistakes that you make along your demanding, but beautiful journey.