I find it interesting to look at the world from the perspective of individual happiness. To put it simply – every little thing that was done or created by humanity, happened because at least one person thought it will lead to happiness, that it will improve someone’s life.
There are 7 billions people in the world now and every single one of them wants to have an amazing life. Each one wants to be happy, loved and fulfilled. But look at the variety of ways people use to achieve this!
If we only look at the surface of someone’s amazing life, we are risking to believe that we need to get the same things, build the same relationships and earn the same amount of money to be as happy as they are. If we fall into this illusion, we may build exactly the same life as the other person, but it won’t be amazing for us. So we have to look deeper and find tools, rather than ready-made solutions, to build our own happiness.
Here is a list of “ tools” that will help you build and live an amazing life:
0. Take care of yourself
It could go without saying, but I want to mention it anyway, because our physical, emotional and mental health is the basis of everything. Nothing lasts long without a solid foundation. We always need to have it in mind and find ways to take good care of our health. With so much information openly available to everyone on this topic today, it has never been easier.
1. Question everything, but trust yourself
This world offers a lot of opinions, knowledge and wisdom which you can choose from and base your life on. But only you are capable of knowing what fits and works for you. All this variety is here for a reason and every single route, belief or value has it’s right to exist and serves a purpose to someone. If we either follow or reject someone else’s views blindly, we seriously limit ourselves in our growth.
It’s better to keep questioning and exploring different ways of being this world shows to us, to finally find our own. But to recognize it we have to trust ourselves. We have to practice listening to and trusting our inner voice, to strengthen it. Because the moment you’ll find something that’s true for you, people around might call you “crazy” and push you to conform to their beliefs.
You’ll have to learn to switch off from the crowd’s voice and follow your gut, because if you lose this battle, your life will never become amazing.
2. Trust that your role here is important
We tend to think that only specific groups of people matter, that only rich and powerful can influence the world, that only doctors and firemen are important, because they save lives, etc. But what if you are not interested in becoming a doctor, politician or a financial adviser?
Sometimes we believe that if we don’t have money, power or influence, it means that our role is quite small. But there are no small roles here, they all have meaning. Whether you are a hairdresser, making someone feel prettier, or a stay-at-home mom, doing your best to raise brilliant future generation, you have a valuable impact on this world in your own way.
So don’t measure yourself, your achievements or success against someone else. After all, success is not fitting in to some pre-made form. Success is expanding and living to your full potential. Your potential is unique and your success will be different from others’.
3. Make small steps towards your dreams every day.
Your dream is greater than life? I can relate. But I bet that you often find yourself sitting around and thinking about it more than doing anything towards it. I’ve been there too. When we think about our big dreams, we see the immense amount of work we have to do and it can overwhelm us.
Balance your thought-action proportion. Instead of over-thinking and daydreaming, make a tiny bit of effort towards your goal, but do it every day. We know about power of compounding for our finances, the same idea can be applied to our efforts – invest a little bit of effort regularly and the result will grow.
4. Enjoy the journey
There is little point in going towards your goal, while beating yourself up and torturing with negative or fearful thoughts on the way. Happiness from achieving a goal usually lasts less, than the time it takes you to get there.
If you dream of becoming a CEO of a company, for example, it will take you maybe 10-15 years to climb there. Do you want to spend these 10-15 years stressed out, anxious and angry, until the day you are promoted to CEO and then be happy for 2-3 weeks, after which you will get to your regular mood again? If not, make an effort to find something positive in every day of your journey towards your goal and the years you’ll spend getting there will be amazing.
5. Learn to accept people the way they are
We all know that relationships are a very important part of our lives. We also know how much struggle and pain they can bring. The ultimate recipe to improve any kind of relationship is to learn to accept people with their flaws.
It doesn’t mean giving up on them, or sacrificing your well-being, or even loving them. It just means understanding that they are on their own journey, that there is a reason why they are like this and that if you were in their shoes, you’d probably be the same too. Give them freedom to be themselves, just like you’d want someone to give that freedom to you.
Let them be and the amount of conflict in your life will decrease, saving you more energy for building your amazing life.
6. Live! Don’t just pass your time
Finally, make sure that you actually live, rather than run in a circle of mindless routine, filled with meaningless distractions. If you are in a very common situation when you work only for money, maintain relationships just not to be lonely and aimlessly watch TV in your spare time just to relax and distract your mind, you have to find a strength to break these patterns.
To live an amazing life you need to have a vision of where you want to go and stop distracting yourself from going there. As Tony Robbins put it shortly and precisely: “Distraction does not create a life of significance”.