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How To Stay Strong When Dealing With Problems In Life (3 Golden Rules)

Polina Soul Healing Leave a Comment

There is no recipe or secret tip on how to avoid problems and difficult situations in our life. They happen to everyone and we can’t control it. The only thing in our control is how we react to these difficulties and how fast we can get ourselves together to overcome them.

I had a fair share of my own troubles and I had many people coming to me for support while going through their difficult times. I noticed that we all have different ways of coping, but ultimately the speed at which we get back on our feet when life is trying to crush us, depends on how well we follow these 3 simple rules:

1. Don’t let the difficult situation describe you.

If you lost your job and call yourself “loser”, if you are going through divorce and constantly stamp yourself  as “worthless”, not only you are wrong in your thinking, but you are also making it more difficult for yourself to bounce back.

We have to separate ourselves from situations that happen to us, because situations are not describing the way we are, they are just giving us a chance to experiment and project our different qualities and abilities in to the world. But it is always our own choice what to show. If we let the situation describe us, we only put another meaningless label on ourselves and never grow beyond this label.

2. Don’t let the difficult situation mess up your beliefs.

This grows out of previous mistake that we can make. Once we label ourselves because of the situation we are in, the next step is to limit our way of thinking to fit the label. If you got fired and marked yourself as a loser, it is easy to start thinking that you won’t find any good job now, and even if you’re lucky to find it, you might still think you’re not a good worker and expect to be mistreated and fired again.

Same goes for the divorce example. Once your marriage fell apart and you labeled yourself as “worthless”, you begin living by this label, thinking that you’ll never have a happy marriage again.
Once our mind starts working in this way, it’s very difficult to turn it around and start believing that something good will happen to us. That’s why we should watch our internal dialog carefully and cut these false beliefs at their root.

3. Don’t let the difficult situation change your personality.

Difficult circumstances can be overwhelming and sometimes force us to act like we never did before. But we should not forget about our true selves and our values even during the tough times. If you are a loving person and someone turned their back on you, should you stop being loving? Should you give up your personal trait, a part of your unique personality, just because someone else wasn’t loving?
If we become reflective to the external situations, we lose ourselves. No matter what situation you are facing, remember who you really are and stay true to yourself.

To sum up, life challenges are hard enough on their own, so we shouldn’t make them even harder by adding 3 more layers of unnecessary pain. With these 3 rules in mind, we can focus on quickly dealing with the situation, instead of beating up or sabotaging ourselves.

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